My x was abusive, I still suffer

2022.01.19 07:09 somedaymaysomedaynot My x was abusive, I still suffer

I've never shared my story with anyone besides my now husband (M36). I am F(34). This will probably be long. But I need to share, and I would like your thoughts on how this is affecting me now - I will elaborate on this further down. I wish we could afford therapy for me, but we can't.
Anyway. 7 years ago I finally managed to break free from an abusive relationship lasting 6 years. Unfortunately (although I wouldn't change things, I love them) I had two sons with my x, so I still have to coparent. Our coparenting is fine, as he works so much and it's usually his wife and I who communicate, and I really like her. But I am forever marked by what he did to me.
During our relationship he made me think I was crazy. My self-esteem was already really low, and he used this fact. He would get angry at the smallest things, like me dropping something, and then tell me how stupid and clumsy I was. He used me as a housewife. He never helped with kids or chores, and whenever I brought it up he made sure to make me seem unreasonable - I just had another standard for when things should get done according to him. Even when I would battleing severe depression and anxiety, he wouldn't help. He was so manipulative, a genius at making everything seem like my fault. And I believed it. I was isolated from family and friends, and I was so broken. He would do what he could to make me really really angry and that use that anger against me as evidence of my apparent craziness.
Finally I managed to leave him, and for a month until he moved out the abuse turned even more traumatizing. He wouldnt leave me alone. He texted and called me nonstop, and if I didn't answer he said that clearly I was not willing to cooperate, and that maybe we should take our custody agreement to court. So I had to be available ALL the time. Nonstop calls and texts. He was extremely mean and nasty to me. He followed me around, refused to leave when I got dressed. I would lock myself in the bathroom to shower, he would find the Xtra key and barge in, claiming that it was his house to, so he had a right to use the bathroom whenever.
He said, that he didn't care how much psychological terror he had to use if it meant I was punished for ruining his life (because I left him). He would punch his hand and say "this is your head". When I was sleeping, he would barge in in the middle of the night when I was sound asleep and start telling me off or yelling at me, scaring me awake. He emptied our home, threatened to cause problems if I didn't let him have stuff. Several times I had to quickly find both keys and lock myself in the bathroom to physically get away from him.
It was so traumatizing. When he moved out he wouldn't give me the key until the city had changed his address in the registers. He claimed that until then it was still his home, so he could drop by whenever he wanted.
During this time he would sometimes break down, apologize profusely and promise to stop. But it never lasted long, until he started again. I cannot... It was just so terrible, I don't know how I didn't just lose it completely.
Now I'm happily married with a man, that treats me right. But I still suffer in the aftermath. If my husband seems slightly annoyed or even if he just sighs, I am in fight or flight right away. I walk on eggshells and I become terrified, even though my husband has never done anything bad. I have hard time sleeping at night and wake up a lot. I don't like sleeping with my back to the door. I do everything I can to prevent even normal conflict. I don't really have any close relationships beside my husband, I can't maintain them.
I don't know how to move on, as this is really affecting the way I function in relationships. I would love to hear your thought on my experiences and my current situation.
I'm sorry for not doing a tl;Dr. I can't see how I would boil all this down to a few sentences.
submitted by somedaymaysomedaynot to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 OnlyMeeemz [over 18] I’m obsessed with this comfy bodysuit I got for my birthday :)

[over 18] I’m obsessed with this comfy bodysuit I got for my birthday :) submitted by OnlyMeeemz to selfie [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Shion__1374 Legends Arceus leaks from Twitter

Legends Arceus leaks from Twitter submitted by Shion__1374 to pokemon [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 NwKdOnTheBlockchain 'What makes the blockchain stack unique is that we have economic protocols embedded into it intrinsically.' ~John deVadoss on GBBC's Blockchain Central Davos: Day 1

'What makes the blockchain stack unique is that we have economic protocols embedded into it intrinsically.' ~John deVadoss on GBBC's Blockchain Central Davos: Day 1 submitted by NwKdOnTheBlockchain to NEO [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Jcon_Josh Things to know before homebrewing Wii U?

I homebrewed my Wii no problem a while back but I’ve heard the Wii U is easier to brick so what should I know before I do it
submitted by Jcon_Josh to homebrew [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 PirkkaPresorit Your deepest secrets and every password are publicly seen by everyone in the Library of Babel.

submitted by PirkkaPresorit to Showerthoughts [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 iamcalifw 💥 METADAO Just stealth launched 1 minutes | No Airdrop | Metaland DAO-based team and rapidly growing community |KYC In Progress | CG/CMC incoming | Early Low Cap just launched, the Next x1000 GEM 💎

MetaDAO decentralized Binance Smart Chain Token our mission is to bring people an ease bsc transfers, strong community, and sustainability. It's a 100% community token, every holder should promote it, if you want to pump your investment, you need to do some effort.
Telegram : https://t.me/metadaogroups
Alright guys, you all are so early 😍 Huge profit coming..... Yes... We make sure all is ready and safe and in few mins time ... We will be renouncing ownership soon .... Great time to bag more, Perfect time if you are getting this now.🥳
Mission Bringing people together through the ease of our Bsc transfers, strong community, and push for sustainability. We may be strong apart. But we’re better when we’re grow together.
This is safe. Liquidity is locked and ownership is renounced. No way of a rug pull! Dev seems transparent and trustworthy.
Don’t you miss the goood old days of bsc? When projects could actually survive without a rewards contract selling and buying pressure not being able to keep up? When people actually HELD and had the patience to not dump for little profit. Come join us now!
✅ Buy & Sell 0%
✅ Locked Liquidity
✅ Verified Smart Contract
✅ Promos after launch
✅ Based Team
✅ Stealth Launch
✅ Liquidity locked
✅ Total supply 100,000,000,000,000
✅ Slippage : 0%
Telegram : https://t.me/metadaogroups
✅Contract: 0x324e4705d46689b2b8756a7224758bd27932e980
✅Pancakeswapv2 : https://pancakeswap.finance/swap?outputCurrency=0x324e4705d46689b2b8756a7224758bd27932e980
✅ Chart : https://charts.bogged.finance/?c=bsc&t=0x324e4705d46689b2B8756A7224758Bd27932e980
submitted by iamcalifw to CryptoMarsShots [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Scouseulster Mod to show position on mini map galactic conquest

This would be super useful, when I look at the mini map I don’t know where I am half the time, using thrawns revenge mod
submitted by Scouseulster to StarWarsEmpireAtWar [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 ALPHAWOLF007666 No idea what other means

No idea what other means submitted by ALPHAWOLF007666 to HolUp [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 ChangeNow_io Top 10 of the World’s Most Outstanding NFTs

Top 10 of the World’s Most Outstanding NFTs submitted by ChangeNow_io to NFTCollect [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Appsi Xbox EU looking for guild

submitted by Appsi to elderscrollsonline [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Bubbly_Quantity5097 Question for y'all, sorry for ignorance lmfao

Well guys... It happened, Microsoft bought blizzard, what's the future of Overwatch? Will be anything subject to change?
submitted by Bubbly_Quantity5097 to Overwatch [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 TheClownOfGod HyperX Pulsefire Surge issue

It suddenly stopped working, the lights are on but it looks buggy and jittery, like it's lagging or something.
Mouse pointer isn't working as well. I can only use the mouse wheel.
u/HyperX or anyone could help me regarding this issue?
submitted by TheClownOfGod to HyperX [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 iamcalifw 💥 METADAO Just stealth launched 1 minutes | No Airdrop | Metaland DAO-based team and rapidly growing community |KYC In Progress | CG/CMC incoming | Early Low Cap just launched, the Next x1000 GEM 💎

MetaDAO decentralized Binance Smart Chain Token our mission is to bring people an ease bsc transfers, strong community, and sustainability. It's a 100% community token, every holder should promote it, if you want to pump your investment, you need to do some effort.
Telegram : https://t.me/metadaogroups
Alright guys, you all are so early 😍 Huge profit coming..... Yes... We make sure all is ready and safe and in few mins time ... We will be renouncing ownership soon .... Great time to bag more, Perfect time if you are getting this now.🥳
Mission Bringing people together through the ease of our Bsc transfers, strong community, and push for sustainability. We may be strong apart. But we’re better when we’re grow together.
This is safe. Liquidity is locked and ownership is renounced. No way of a rug pull! Dev seems transparent and trustworthy.
Don’t you miss the goood old days of bsc? When projects could actually survive without a rewards contract selling and buying pressure not being able to keep up? When people actually HELD and had the patience to not dump for little profit. Come join us now!
✅ Buy & Sell 0%
✅ Locked Liquidity
✅ Verified Smart Contract
✅ Promos after launch
✅ Based Team
✅ Stealth Launch
✅ Liquidity locked
✅ Total supply 100,000,000,000,000
✅ Slippage : 0%
Telegram : https://t.me/metadaogroups
✅Contract: 0x324e4705d46689b2b8756a7224758bd27932e980
✅Pancakeswapv2 : https://pancakeswap.finance/swap?outputCurrency=0x324e4705d46689b2b8756a7224758bd27932e980
✅ Chart : https://charts.bogged.finance/?c=bsc&t=0x324e4705d46689b2B8756A7224758Bd27932e980
submitted by iamcalifw to CryptoGemDiscovery [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 roohvsleal Desisti (como é bom)

Desisti de ser mandado embora porque ainda não aprendi minha nova função no trabalho por problemas pessoais em casa, desisti de tentar agradar minha namorada que vive triste e não sabe se conter, desisti de me olhar e sempre me achar feio ou estranho, desisti de tentar ficar me mudando pra agradar as pessoas, desisti de ficar com agonia toda vez que olho a fatura do meu cartão, desisti, eu só vivo um dia de cada vez agora resolvendo o que eu posso, o que eu não posso foda se, eu vou me resolvendo conforme as coisas aparecem, como é bom desistir. Recomendo.
submitted by roohvsleal to desabafos [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 dreamermentality Hello there! a gloomy person here looking for a friend

Let's support each other while we ride on our own boats through the storm to a calmer shore.
The one thing I admire about people is the ability to be vulnerable. We can talk about anything and share memes a lot. And i mean a lot. We can share our fav music and movies. Also if sometimes we're both free we can watch something together on discord.
So yeah feel free to hmu and let's dive into a no ego zone. No I won't expect and will also not text u all the time cuz we have our lives to live too.
It would be preferable if you were from the east so that the time zones did not differ too much.
Plz no creeps tho, there seem to a lot on reddit apparently.
submitted by dreamermentality to MakeNewFriendsHere [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 ekain-io Crushing the monopoly of the publishing industry with a decentralized Marketplace for PDF NFTs

Few months ago we asked whats the best marketing strategy to promote on Reddit. You said : "Have an actual product"
We said: "Okay"
We are live finally and it feels great for all of us after 3–4 months full of work and learning. But as you hopefully know from our other social media channels it’s only the prototype we are releasing for the moment. First, it has to be properly tested by you guys before we go live. 🏁
Links to our Idea and the prototype are in the comments.
Share with us your thoughts! 🙏
submitted by ekain-io to CryptoCurrency [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Arslan_maxhar Moorex project

Moorex project has a lot of potential in the near future and this is the best chance for investors to make big profits because this project has a strong roadmap and especially has teamwork.
submitted by Arslan_maxhar to NewCoins [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Onyx_Sourbell Stable cryptocurrency can help shore up your savings against inflation loss

submitted by Onyx_Sourbell to kucoin [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 BrightBurn15 😘

😘 submitted by BrightBurn15 to FapCEOLeaks [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 haber-trend Sıcak! | ***ARCLK*** ARÇELİK A.Ş.( Özel Durum Açıklaması (Genel) #Arçelik #Manisa #Çayırova #MustafaKemalBulvarı son saatin en çok aranan 12. trend haberi oldu ve an itibarıyla 6 gazetede yer alıyor.

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2022.01.19 07:09 AlternativeSonGoku Jeg skal en tur på KFC 😃

Jeg skal en tur på KFC 😃 submitted by AlternativeSonGoku to InfluencergossipDK [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 JobHuntersMod1 WRITING / JOURNALISM Jobs & Paid Internships

Hi JobHunters! If you are looking for entry-level remote Writing / Journalism roles, please check out the latest posts on The Remote JobHunters' job board below:
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For more roles, be sure to subscribe to our newsletter - https://theremotejobhunters.com/sub-newsletter
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2022.01.19 07:09 cinekson Core web vitals and drop in serps

So recently we moved from a2 hosting + litespeed caching solution. We moved to wp rocket and getting 99/100 on page speed score. Since the move the good urls have dropped off the cliff. I am very confused. Been a week or so and good urls numbers are dropping. Very strange compared to what I seen on all other sites. Any suggestions?
submitted by cinekson to webdev [link] [comments]


2022.01.19 07:09 Dynamiquehealth Palm like shrub?

Palm like shrub? submitted by Dynamiquehealth to whatplantisthis [link] [comments]


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